defyingfrigidity | Thirteenth Flake [Text]

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Thirteenth Flake [Text]

[Normally, Elsa doesn't care for making text posts. Video helps her be more open people, and even after over a year here, she could always use more help with that! But there are still rare occasions where she just... doesn't trust her emotions to stay under control. So text it is for those days.]

For those of you who have been here for quite a while now:
Is there... any good way to cope with people from other worlds leaving?
I know that, when people from your own world leave, you can be comforted in the fact that you'll see them again when you return home.

But... what about those from other worlds?
They're gone, and unless you remain here for long enough that you return, you'll never see them again.
And if they're important to you, just as much as the people from your own world...

How can you get over the disappearance of someone like that?

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[See, that first thing works when you know you'll see them again when you return home. But, well...some people aren't so lucky.]

I don't really think you have to "get over it", so much as you...you come to terms with it, after a while. The memories you make with them while they are here are irreplaceable. That's something that nobody can ever take from you.

But...I also try not to think about it like I'll never see them again. It isn't very likely in a lot of cases, yes...but if living here has taught me anything, it's that nothing is truly impossible.

You really just have to remember the times when they were here...and remember them fondly. I know that if I ever went home, I would want the people I knew to do the same.

I'm trying. It's been a few days, and I've tried to keep positive, but...

[But when you have feelings for the person that disappeared, and you never told them about it, looking back on those memories, those times that fueled those feelings...]

It's so difficult. And I don't want those memories to go from ones that make me happy to ones that are just... sad, now.

I understand. That's one of the hardest parts about it, I think...you don't want those memories to be tarnished by their leaving, so to speak.

Something that has helped me is to find someone I really trust to talk to about it. When you're ready, of course.

Exactly.
I've... had enough memories tainted by bad events that followed. I don't want my memories of her to meet the same fate.

I have my sister, of course. But I'm the older one; it feels wrong to put my problems on her, when it should be the other way around.

As much as I'm sure you're there for her, she probably wants to be there for you in the same way. That's...what siblings are for, right?

That's true, yes.
But she's done so much for me. More than I've done for her.
So I feel more than a little guilty.

Mm...it sounds like she's a very good sister to you. I wish I knew more to say that might help you feel better...though I am just as willing to listen to whatever you might feel like talking about. I won't have all of the answers, but...sometimes it's just nice having someone there to listen at all, I think.

Thank you. I appreciate it, truly.

It's just... is it normal to not really know what exactly you're feeling, because you're feeling so much?
I just don't know which it is that's affecting me the most.

No, I know what you mean. I think that's normal. You're just feeling overwhelmed by everything...and there's so much to feel that you can't settle on any one thing.

Exactly.
And feeling so overwhelmed makes me think that I should just wait and let it settle before I try and sort out my feelings.
But I know that letting things drag on like that isn't healthy by any means.
So it's... confusing.

I think it really depends on how long you wait. There is nothing wrong with taking some time to yourself to try and work things out on your own. But it would become a problem if left that way for too long, yes.

But you sound like you know yourself better than most. I think after you've had some time to process it, it will get easier. It will still be hard, but...easier.

You're wrong about that, I think.
I know some things that are bad for me, but. I've ignored how I've felt and forced myself to feel how I think I should feel for so long that I don't think I know myself at all.

Which is why this is all such a mess, I think.

I suppose that's also one reason why this is so hard to deal with. I just.... don't want to go back to how things used to be.

If that's the case, then...I think you realizing that is the first step to dealing with it better. Because if you know that about yourself, you can work on trying to improve it.

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Thirteenth Flake [Text]

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