defyingfrigidity | Twelfth Flake [video]

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Twelfth Flake [video]

I looked at the date today, and I thought it would be fitting to bring up something I've been wondering for a while.

[It's been a while since Elsa got contemplative over the network. Thankfully, Elsa doesn't look all that upset or nervous, so it's nothing serious!]

Years pass here, and we all age. This is my second birthday in Johto; according to the calendar, I should be twenty-three today.

But that's only compared to how time passes here. What about back home? If we return home after spending years here, do we return as we were when we were first brought here? Or do we just... return to our land older, as we are now? I can't imagine how that might change things in our worlds, even if we have no memories of this place when we go home.

[... Okay yeah it did get kind of deep.]

It's curious, isn't it? Especially when one's taken from a date that doesn't match the date here when they first arrive.

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... I can understand that very well.

[Her words... they're actually very comforting.]

I think the reason I've been thinking so much about all of this is because I'm afraid it would all just... go away. The people I've met, the things I've done... the things I've discovered about myself...

I don't think I could've done any of that without this place. So the thought of all of that just changing is a bit terrifying.

I understand. You feel like you've already done so much changing and soul-searching here, but suddenly it can all be ripped away and you're back where you started. It's a scary thought.

[Either that or suddenly you can turn around and your friends will be gone, but...Maka's experienced that enough, she doesn't want to think about it, and she doesn't want to burden the poor woman with that thought.]

It is. I was able to come to terms with some things about myself back home, but even so... I think I'm a completely different person here, because of here.

... I don't know if I want to go back to that.

[She knows that Anna will help her, that their people will help her, but... she was so much more nervous and anxious back home. Going back to that... it's scary.]

Yeah.

["Yeah." Maybe an inappropriate thing to respond with, yet...it says all of what Maka feels when she thinks about being taken back home. Sure, maybe it will take the edge off the pain she feels about people she has loved and lost, but as shown it doesn't stop the ache of...homesickness in her soul.]

It's hard when you know there's duties you're still held to, and there's people you care about that aren't here too. At the same time it...it feels better to be here sometimes. [Like a pleasant dream.]

... Right.

[It's been a while, but... man. She knows how that feels, worrying about her responsibilities back home even as she has fun here.]

I know time stops back home, but... I have an entire kingdom to look out for. The idea that I'm not doing anything and the urge to get working again is something that's tough to fight.

It makes you feel guilty, doesn't it?

Mhm. [She smiles, though it seems...not forced, but melancholic. Though Maka is technically still a child, she carries herself with the demeanor of a person that's seen and experienced a lot. A lot of what isn't all too clear, just that it wasn't all pleasant things.]

I have a duty to protect the people of my world. Nothing special, not like being a queen, but...it's something I was born to do, and...it's something I do my best to continue here, even if it's not like home. Sure, there's still horrible people that try to hurt others, but it's not exactly the same.

[In the same token, though, even if time was stopped Maka's sure they'd do fine without her...it wouldn't help the guilt and worry, but they'd do fine.]

I guess what I'm trying to say is...the hardest thing about being here has been trying to find a new purpose for myself.

[Elsa laughs a little; a subdued sound, like Maka's smile.]

Protecting people of the world isn't special? Honestly, I think that's a lot more important than being a queen.

There are lots of people that want to protect others, even if they don't fight for it like I do. Even you, as a queen, want to look out for and protect your people plus the people you care for.

[At least that's the impression she gets from Elsa anyway, Maka's not exactly experienced with queens coming from a modern time.]

There's also a lot of people like me in general that work out of the Academy and defend people.

["I'm a recruit, there's tons of me."]

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