defyingfrigidity | [ryslig IC Inbox]

[ryslig IC Inbox]

WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, QUEENOFICEOLATION. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 013.11.221.20 * QUEENOFICEOLATION has joined 013.11.221.20 <QUEENOFICEOLATION> I think I've finally gotten the hang of these devices. <QUEENOFICEOLATION> So! <QUEENOFICEOLATION> There's no harm in setting up one of these, yes? <QUEENOFICEOLATION>** (Thanks to those of you who helped me do so and I'm sorry if I frustrated anyone)

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Elsa? I think we ought to talk.

Edited 2016-05-01 09:36 (UTC)

Of course. Whatever you need to get off your chest.

[Though she knows what this is about, there's no way it can be anything else...]

I made a damn fool of myself. You were right.

It's okay.
I know better than most how it feels to not think right in a state of panic.
I shouldn't have yelled at you when we were all so obviously affected by the memories we were seeing.

No, I mean

[Ugh. How does he say this?]

You were right that I shouldn't have used it on anyone without being completely sure it was safe. That's common sense and I shouldn't have argued with you on it. But what I mean is you were right because now I know

Now I know it wasn't safe at all.

[Oh no...]

Are you okay?

If you don't want to tell me about it, that's fine.
But if you'd rather talk about this in person, we can do that too, if you'd like.

I'd understand if you didn't want to be around me, knowing what I did. But it might help to talk about it just to get my thoughts in order. It's been a lot to try and wrangle.

[He can't just erase it and go on living in ignorance, unfortunately, even if it's the preferable solution here. He could just pretend it's not an issue but with how many people know after that glass maze debacle he really can't get away with not addressing it. He feels he owes it to her the most out of all of them.

He doesn't answer the question about whether he's okay or not. The answer he has to give isn't the one she wants to hear. The omission is probably more telling than anything else.]

In the end, you only wanted to help others as well as yourself.
You were trying to do good.
I can understand that. And how it feels to have good intentions backfire on you like that.
It would be hypocritical of me to shut you out for that.

You're still my friend, Fiddleford.
That's not going to change anytime soon.

Neither will the fact that my door in Bavan will always be open to you.

I might take you up on that, if you don't mind. This is the sort of conversation that's probably better had face to face.

[He hasn't actually visited her home yet -- between all the things happening by virtue of Ryslig simply being Ryslig he never had time -- but it's a simple matter of just asking her where it's located. He might have waited to visit, taken a few more days to be absolutely sure he wanted to talk about this, but he's kind of pathetically desperate for reassurance right now and she's undeniably his best bet for getting it.]

Elsa?

[It takes a moment for Elsa to answer the door, during which the sound of several loud somethings being moved around. She doesn't keep him waiting long, thankfully, and when she opens the door, there's a smile on her face.]

Hello, Fiddleford. I'm glad you decided to come.

[When he enters, he'll probably notice the way some of the furniture has been pushed against the walls, leaving a nice open area so that his tail won't become all cramped or wound awkwardly around chairs and tables. A little gesture, but she hopes it'll make him feel a bit more comfortable...]

[It's weird how just that one little thing is so dang touching. She took the time to rearrange her whole living room just so he'd be a little more comfortable, and if that isn't the sweetest thing he couldn't possibly say what is.]

So am I.

[He settles himself in the open space, using his own tail as a coiled-up couch. At least it's good for that.]

You been holdin' up alright?

[Yes. He's here to talk about himself, so clearly the correct way to start this conversation is to do the exact opposite.]

[Elsa's smile falls, but it's a look of concern, rather than any bad feelings bubbling up.]

I should be asking you that.

[Sorry man, Elsa's a master at deflecting when the topic turns to her.]

[No, no. At least this time she's right. He's the one who started deflecting first; she's just gently nudging the conversation back on track. Probably best. Given his way he'd skirt around things for as long as possible.]

It's.

[He runs a hand through his bangs; they spring back into place the moment his hand's past them, stubborn as ever.]

All I wanted was to help people. That's all I ever meant to do.

[It takes a moment for Elsa to respond because wow... is this how Anna felt, when she was trying to get through to her?]

I know. I can't blame you for that. But... sometimes, people are so focused on wanting to help others, that they can't realize that their help is in fact hurting others as well.

It's... a very sharp double-edged sword.

[She knows from experience.]

I shouldn't have put it over her.

[And here we get to the heart of things. If what he'd done had meant something, had really helped even one person, it might have been worth it. As it is he just bet his money on the wrong horse and came out of things empty-handed and all alone. It's a hard thing to accept, that something you poured yourself into so deeply was so pointless.]

I drove away my own family for nothing.

[Elsa nearly flinches at that. It... hit a nerve that's still pretty raw.]

It's horrible, isn't it? Driving people away because you love them so much. Even though it hurts. And you don't realize how bad it is until it's too late.

[Almost too late, in Elsa case, but for one brief moment, the worst had come to pass.]

And that's the thing about it. I'm never goin' to see her again and that's how she's goin' to remember me.

Thank you for stickin' with me even after... y'know. Knowin' all this. It means a lot.

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<hadron> they're buddies i assume they have exchanged channel numbers

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